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Dec 23, 2009, 9:45am

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Blind Melon :: General :: Shannon Hoon :: I woke up the day that he didn't.
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AuthorTopic: I woke up the day that he didn't. (Read 141 times)
nakednoggin
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I woke up the day that he didn't.
« Thread Started on Nov 1, 2009, 10:49pm »
I considered using vacantnoggin, but I don't think of myself as stupid.
Open minded yes, but not stupid.

I never mourned the death of a rockstar like I did for Shannon
(if I ever did mourn the death of a rockstar prior).
I relate to him (short the heavy, hard drug abuse).
I can sound like him when I sing. I play guitar, but my skills are a bit short of Blind Melon quality.

His daughter was born when my daughter was 6 (I got my high school sweetheart pregnant).

I vowed not to let my baby girl go through life without knowing me.
My heart broke for Nico Blue.
I was a voice on the phone or a picture in a letter.
Broke, out of work, homeless, I busked on street corners to try and make enough money to go and be near her.
I didn't make enough. I fed myself, drank and stuff.
Once in a while I'd paint a house, work my ass off for churches and stuff.
The money wasn't that much, but I'd send it to her mom.

Finally a friend helped me by driving me out to see her for the first time since I held her at 6mths old.
She was 8 (almost 9).

We spent the time just being near each other. Our heads leaning on one another.
Eventually I gave up trying to make money with my music like my parents suggested (when I started). I finally gave in. It needed to be done at the time.

I met someone, she helped me by accepting my faults and qualities equally.
We moved farther away from my daughter, or anything else I knew, than I had been before.
However, our careers afforded us to visit my little girl more than ever
(3 times a year for 3 weeks at a time). When she was 12 my daughter moved in with us.
Stayed until she was 16 and became an independent woman before our eyes.
My relationship with my daughter is stronger than anything I ever felt now.
Shannon's example taught me to actively do something about stuff. And not to end up in an internal hell, torn apart by demons, that I believe took his life.
Over the years I kept thinking about Nico.
There must have been tremendous support for her, and ample love to help her.
But I know my little girl used to talk to me when I wasn't there. It was like I was dead to her for most of her childhood.
That's something that Nico has to live with her whole life.

Keep talking to him Nico. You're the biggest part of him left on the planet.
His love never died, and never will.
It's strange, because I never actually met your dad. But he impacted my life greatly.
I'm a Canadian that moved to the Arctic almost 4 years after he died.
His music; I played it, and it helped me deal with stuff.
It's good to cry sometimes too. Sometimes crying can be a picture, a song or anything that makes you feel good (in the long run).
I hope it's not a drug. But I suppose there may be some good ones-? I'm more of a homeopathic kinda guy.

Well that's why I joined this site. I wanted to thank Shannon's existence and talents for reaching me.

I want to give some love back.

Take care.


I'm realizing this is a bit heavy. The other thing I realized is that a lot of you are musicians. Maybe I'll upload a tune sometime. I read a bunch of other posts in this Greetings and Introductions thing, and I apologize if this sort of entry is in fact kind of vacant noggined there.
Hopefully the posting is better suited here.
« Last Edit: Nov 8, 2009, 2:42am by nakednoggin »Link to Post - Back to Top  IP: Logged
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holyman47
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Re: I woke up the day that he didn't.
« Reply #1 on Nov 5, 2009, 2:31pm »
Thats deep man, where abouts are you in arctic Canada? I live in YK NT if you know where that is.
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Hair raisin shake your much to late you shoulda jumped a couple cars before, And Now If I may I'll Walk away I'm selling silly putty door to door. And Up on the Shelf it seems to help If I can keep a little bit of disease, Cause it's breathin on me......you see its bringing me to my knees.
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Re: I woke up the day that he didn't.
« Reply #2 on Nov 6, 2009, 2:44pm »
lol Ive been in little big town for thirteen years. since I was six. lol Im fairly young
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Hair raisin shake your much to late you shoulda jumped a couple cars before, And Now If I may I'll Walk away I'm selling silly putty door to door. And Up on the Shelf it seems to help If I can keep a little bit of disease, Cause it's breathin on me......you see its bringing me to my knees.
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Re: I woke up the day that he didn't.
« Reply #3 on Nov 7, 2009, 8:38am »
Hard life... We all think that we live a hard life, but there is always a harder one..

"It's good to cry sometimes too" You are definitely right...

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings..
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"...If I could only show you how I feel
Then you wouldn't bother me
And then maybe you'd see why we don't mind being blind..."
nakednoggin
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Re: I woke up the day that he didn't.
« Reply #4 on Nov 8, 2009, 1:09am »
Not so hard really. I've lived a fairly blessed life despite what I wrote.

All life is hard isn't it.
Hard life <---matter of perspective I think.

I appreciate my experiences, for more than one reason.
The most important reason I appreciate my experiences, is that my hard times weren't harder.

Nothing's totally easy,
and there's no point going around making life harder for ourselves I figure.

I think humans have a knack for making life harder than it needs to be.
Maybe it is a way of conditioning for the unexpected.

Yeah sharing is good I think. Mostly.
I'm trying to shake inhibitions. I tend to talk a lot as a result.
But....... dat wuz fine.



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"Integrity is looking forward to the consequences of your actions."
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